I’m astounded I don’t have a boyfriend.
I’m astounded I don’t have a boyfriend.
Can we talk about how unbelievably adorable Winnie the Pooh is? I mean look at him all snuggled up under his blanket for safety!
Why has he got rifle?
to keep away the heffalumps and woozles you moron
IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”
I’m not sure if it’s normal for me to be this upset over a celebrity’s passing, but I’m so sad about this.
it takes two
Meet Indiana and Harlow, Instagram’s dynamic doggie duo.
When it comes to being best friends, size definitely doesn’t matter.
Indiana is like a pint sized accessory Harlow likes to carry around. Depending on the occasion, Indiana makes the perfect hat. Or a cosy scarf.
Follow Indiana and Harlow to see what their next adventure will be.
“I mean, God bless The Notebook. It introduced me to one of the great loves of my life. But people do Rachel and me a disservice by assuming we were anything like the people in that movie. Rachel and my love story is a hell of a lot more romantic than that. It wasn’t the attention that broke us up, I don’t know what to say. The only thing I remember is we both went down swingin’ and called it a draw.”
- Ryan Gosling
Watch how this guy reacts to a girl wearing a Hijab verses a girl not wearing a Hijab.
I don’t really like that she called the guy a “thirsty ass” in the ending (even though I agree with her) because I think she could have made her point without name calling. People, unfortunately, are ignorant. I hate that people judge others by how they look, what they wear, or the way they talk. Everyone I different, no two people are exactly alike, and to judge someone before you get to know them as a person is absolutely ridiculous. But it’s the world we live in, and it’s going to take a hell of a lot for things to change. I hope this one guy changes his perspective about people from here on out.
You all realize this is us in about 20 years.
…this is me now
How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?
These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.
That movie killed my heart
A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera | 'Say Something' (Official Music Video)
I HAVE NEVER HEARD CHRISTINA AGUILERA SING SO SOFTLY
can she do this always please?!?!?
What, who is this? #mindblown